Activity Three
(ages 5 - 7)

Key points

Adults may use tricks or bribes to try to
make children do things that they want them to.

Children can say no to these people.

Note: People who abuse children, both those known and unknown to the child, often use tricks or offer a bribe or treat to get a child to do what they want. They may offer the child a ride in their car, pretending that the child's parent or carer has sent them, or that there has been a problem at home. Children need skills to be able to ignore such offers and to refuse bribes or treats. (Keeping Ourselves Safe 1998, p71). Children should be encouraged to tell a trusted adult if they have been told to keep a secret by someone, especially if that secret makes them feel scared, worried or unsafe.

Some parents and carers may choose a 'no secrets' policy at home. If this is too hard, encourage your children to keep only good secrets (for example, about Christmas presents or birthdays). A general rule of thumb could be that the only secrets kept are those that will be shared soon anyway.

Before you begin the activity

Say to your child, "Sometimes an adult or an older kid who wants you to do something, may offer you a treat or try to trick you into doing it. Today we are going to talk about when this could happen and decide what you could say and do."

Activity

A number of situations have been listed on the work sheet Situations. These can be practised with your child. Choose two more situations that are appropriate to your child's situation or environment. Read each situation aloud and let your child respond with what they could say or do to that person. Acknowledge each of their responses in a positive way and offer further guidance, if appropriate.

Ask your child if the secret or trick is a harmful one or not. (Some examples of what your child could say or do for each situation are also listed on the page Things I Can Say and Do). Once you have read through each situation and practised what your child could say, read through the situations again and encourage your child to use their voice and body language as well (i.e. practise the situations rather than simply reading them aloud).

When you have finished the activity

The Me Saying "No" activity sheet is for your child to complete. They can draw a picture of themselves saying NO to someone who is trying to trick them. If necessary, you can assist younger children to write what they would say to the person trying to trick them, preferably using one of the statements practised earlier.

Put your completed activity sheet on display as agreed between you.